the torments of life
by Lolitaro
Summary: this story has been writen awhile ago. it's my own vision of season 2. things start where season 1 left off. the only diference is that it happens after the summer. Naley for sure. Leyton and other pairings. CHAPTER 11 ONLINE sorry for the delay
1. chapter 1

Author note: Just so you know I start to write this in august, so it's been awhile, I'm still writing it at the moment and i'm not so sure where it's going. I have to tell you that it's my first English fic so my English is probably not the best, but I hope you will be able to forget this little detail (althought it can be a big detail), anyway I hope you'll like this story. Don't forget to review it'll let me know if I should post the next chapter.

**The torments of life ******

Chapter 1

Peyton woke up that morning feeling empty, it had been like this for a long time, probably since Lucas was gone to Charleston with Keith, which meant she'd feeling like this for more than two months. She felt like nothing was worth living for, except maybe her art, that was probably what was keeping her alive at this moment. She didn't know why she hadn't realized sooner how much she loved Lucas. Guess what they say is true, you never know what you have until it's gone.  
She got out of bed and walked to her dresser. She opened the first drawer and took out a worn piece of paper. She got back to her bed and sat on a corner. She unfolded the piece of paper, like she'd done every morning and started to read.

_Dear Peyton, __  
I know you're certainly wondering why I am writing to you. Well, I'm not so sure myself. I could say that it's because I'm sorry, but sorry for what, that wouldn't be really honest if I was writing something like this. Truth been told I'm not a bit sorry about what we shared. If there's one thing I should be sorry for, and believe me I am, it should be about how I screwed up your friendship with Brooke and how I hurt her._

_The moments we shared were a pure joy, I felt like there was nothing in the world that could stop me, stop us. I felt so carefree, I had the feeling I could fly and that's the best feeling ever, I'm sure you experienced this feeling at least once in your life whether it was when you were drawing or with me (sometimes I like to think that you experienced this feeling with me) and you know like me, how good it feels. ___

_Before signing off, there's one last thing I need to tell you, but I don't really know how to, it'll probably be better if I was getting straight to the point. When you're finished reading this letter, I'll probably be gone for a long time. I decided to leave Tree Hill, for good, or at least for a moment. You'll probably think that I'm running away from my problems, that's probably right, but I see it as a way to clear my mind. In case you were wondering, I'm leaving with Keith to __Charleston___

_I sincerely hope you have a nice life, Peyton. Keep on drawing for your own pleasure. ___

_With all my love, __  
Lucas XXX_

She then stared at the letter. She remembered when she first got the letter, she couldn't believe he had have the nerve to write her. He had even written a letter to Brooke. At first she didn't want to read it, but her curiosity won the best of her. Since then, she couldn't believe he was gone…for good. He had left her, no that wasn't right he hadn't left her, she had simply let him go.

She got up again. Just when she was about to open her drawer and put her letter back in, her phone rung. She put the letter on the top of her dresser and run to answer the phone.

"Hello?"   
"Hey Peyt ! It's Brooke. Did you forget me or what ?"  
"What are you talking about ?"  
"You were supposed to pick me up, like 10 minutes ago. It's our first day back to school, remember ?"  
"God! I can't believe I forget !"  
"You can't believe, I can't believe, now that it is all set, get your ass over here, right now ! As much as I hate school, I don't want to be late, for the first day."  
"Give me 15 minutes and I'm here."  
"Okay.", she heard Brooke say before she hung up.  
Peyton ran to her closet and grabbed the first clothes she saw. She put them on, she looked at herself into the mirror, put some lipstick on, fluffing put her hair in place.

Lucas was eating his breakfast with a thoughtful look on his face. He was preoccupied by his past life. He missed his mom, his best friend Haley, he even missed Nathan, but more than all he missed Peyton. He missed everything about her, her curly blond hair, her ocean blue eyes, her pretty face, her spirit, her laugh…

"Hey Luke ! You ready ?" asked Keith when he entered in the kitchen.  
"Huh, What?"  
"I asked you if you were ready, but seeing that you're still eating your breakfast, I'll say that you're not."  
"Give me 10 seconds and I'll be ready." Lucas said, taking a last bite of his toast.  
"I'm ready, now!"  
"Great ! So let's go!"

Lucas follow Keith out of the kitchen. He took his school bag and followed his uncle outside. They got in the car.

"So…What were you thinking about?" said Keith while he was driving out of the driveway.  
"Nothing."  
"Come on, Luke, I know you. I know you were thinking about something back there, you had that look on your face that says you're deep in thoughts." said Keith, giving him a side glance.  
"I told you, I wasn't thinking about something. And what look?"  
"oh, you know, that look!" said a laughing Keith.  
"You're not funny!"  
"Actually, I think I am. But seriously, Lucas, I could swear you were thinking about something back home and I'm sure it has something to do with Tree hill."  
"Maybe" said Lucas looking out the window.  
"your mom?"  
"Not really."  
"I taught so too, I would say it had something to do with a broody curly blond girl, am I right?"

Lucas gave a side glance to Keith and return his gaze to the window.

"So, I'm right."  
"You know Keith, I miss her so much. I didn't know that leaving Tree hill would have that effect on me. I had expected it to be so much more easier."  
"Nothing is keeping you here. You could go back there at anytime."  
"I know."

Karen was walking through the halls of the hospital, a paper bag in hands. She entered a small room.

"Deb?"

The blonde woman stood up from her chair to welcome Karen.  
"Karen! I see you didn't forget me." Deb said, her lips curving in a smile.  
"How could I?" Karen asked, looking down at the sleeping Dan. "Are there any changes?"  
"Nope. He still in coma, nothing have change since your last visit."  
"I see. I brought you breakfast" said Karen. She gave the bag to Deb.  
"Thanks, Karen."  
"You're welcome, by the way, you wouldn't even eat if I didn't bring you something everyday"  
"You're right, I wouldn't." said Deb. She sat back in her chair and stared taking out what was in the bag.  
"How's Nathan?"  
"I wouldn't know, I haven't saw him since he last came to see his father."  
"Which was when?"  
"More than two weeks ago."  
"I see."  
"How's Lucas?"  
"I talked to him yesterday. He says, he's fine. That he loves Charleston, but he misses his friends."  
"And Keith?"  
"Lucas told me that he enjoys himself and that he can't wait to start teaching."  
"That's great"

They stayed in silence until a long sharp noise erupted in the room. They both turned their heads towards Dan, and saw the monitor by his side. Deb rushed to his bedside.

"Dan…noooo!"

Karen got out of the room, in the hall and screamed for someone to come help them.

Nathan knocked on the wooden door of his bathroom.

"Come on Hale, you've been in there for the last 30 minutes."  
"I'm coming."  
"That's what you said 5 minutes ago. We're gonna be late."

The door opened.

"See, I told you I was coming." Said a shining Haley.  
"Took you long enough…" said Nathan under his breath.  
"What did you say?"  
"Me?"  
"Yeah you, who else?"  
"I said, let's go!"  
"Yeah…right. You really think I'm…"

Nathan shut her up with a kiss.

"Did I ever tell you how much I hate when you interrupted me in the middle of my sentences."  
"No, but I'm sure that deep down you like it"  
"Oh gosh, you're so full of yourself" she said with a smile.  
They started walking out of the apartment and headed toward school.  
"I can't believe the summer is already over."  
"I can't either."  
"It's gonna be strange not having Lucas around. I always thought we would stay around each other for our whole lives, but since last year, so many things have changed."  
"I know."  
"It's gonna be tough without him"  
"You know, I'm here for you, right?"  
"Yeah, but that's not the same thing"  
"How come?"  
"You're my boyfriend… I mean husband. There's some things that I can't tell you."  
"Like what?"  
"Stuff…"  
"Well, there's still the phone, you know."  
"Yeah, but it's different."  
"And he's gonna come back once in a while"  
"That's what he said…"  
"See… no need to worry. Even if he's not here in Tree Hill, you will still be able to talk to him."

They walked a little more in silence until they were in front of the school. They saw Peyton and Brooke heading their way.

"Look who's coming" said Nathan to Haley.


	2. chapter 2

**The**** torments of life ****  
Chapter 2**

"Hey Peyton! Look it's them" Brooke said, pointing at Nathan and Haley. "It looks like summer didn't break them apart."  
"Yeah…looks like it" Peyton said without big interest. She was still thinking about Lucas' letter. Deep down inside her, she was hoping Lucas would be there this morning, that he had only left Tree Hill for the summer, but she knew it wasn't the case.  
"You know, it's almost sad that they're still together, here I was hoping for some drama, but there's none."  
"What's sad?" Peyton looked at Brooke blankly, her mind consumed with thoughts of Lucas.  
"I said that it's almost sad they're still together because I'm in need of drama and they would have been a good source."  
"You're mean!"  
"Oh, come on, Peyton ! I was just kidding, but admit it, you wouldn't have thought they would make it trough the summer."  
"They're in love, it's the only thing that matters."  
"Yeah… right"

Brooke started to walk toward the couple, but stopped in her tracks when she realized that Peyton wasn't following her.

"Peyton ?"  
"Huh?"  
"You coming?"   
"Where?"  
"I always thought you were brighter than me, but this morning it looks like I'm the one who's brighter."  
"You know, Brooke, that didn't told me where we were going"  
"Easy, Peyt, we're going to see them."  
Peyton started following Brooke. When they were near Nathan and Haley, Brooke nearly screamed: "Nathan! Tutor girl!"  
"Brooke…Peyton" said Nathan without real excitement.  
"You know Nathan, I would have thought you would be more happy to see me than this."  
"Whatever you say, Brooke."  
"So, how was your summer you two lovebirds?" asked Brooke  
"Great, we didn't see you"  
"You hurt me, Nathan, you really do." Brooke said faking hurt.

Peyton and Haley watched the two interact. It was always like this, they would have this little banter like it was a ritual and then they would stop. Since no one was talking, Haley decided to break the silence.

"How was your summer, guys?"   
"It was normal. Brooke and I spent the whole summer together."  
"Come on, Peyt, it was more than normal, it was terrific! We had a lot of fun."  
"Well, that's great, at least you're friends again."  
"Yeah." Said Peyton, "So Nathan, I heard about your dad, is he okay?"  
"He's been in a coma since his heart attack, the doctors said it was due to a lot of stress. Now, we're waiting for him to wake up."  
"Does Lucas know?"  
"I don't know, probably."  
" I hope your dad's gonna get better soon."   
"I hope so too"  
"ok, it was nice to see both of you, but I have to go, I haven't picked up my schedule yet," Peyton said.

Peyton started to leave with Brooke on her toes.

"We should go too." said Haley.  
"Yeah, but I need something to give me the courage to go back in there after those two months I spent alone with my lovely wife."  
"Shut up!" Haley said, shitting him on the arm. "Don't say it out loud here, I don't want everybody to know"  
"Come on, Hales. They didn't hear me and it doesn't matter if they learn it now, they will someday and right now all I would want to do is screaming at the top of my lungs that you, Haley James, are now Mrs. Scott."  
"Please Nathan, just not now. I mean, your mom doesn't even know it yet, I would prefer if she knows it before the rest of the world."  
"Okay, I will try not to talked about it, but you have to do something for me."  
"What?"  
"Give me a kiss"

Haley got to her toes and kissed lightly Nathan's lips.

Deb and Karen were looking through the window of Dan's room, they could see the doctors working on Dan. Deb was crying and couldn't stop thinking it was her fault. She thought that if Dan have not surprised Keith and her, none of this would have happened. She was sure that it was the reason of his heart attack that and the fact Nathan had turned his back to them.

Karen would've loved to be senseless to what was going on, but she couldn't. even if she hated Dan for what he did to her, she couldn't just stand there and feel nothing, after all he had been her first love and he was the father of her son, without him Lucas wouldn't be in this world. Karen wanted to cry, but she kept herself from doing it. She had to stay strong for Deb.

After a long time, a doctor came out of the room. It was obvious, when you were looking at his face that something had happened, Deb knew it and so was Karen, but they preferred to wait for the doctor to say something.

"Ms. Scott, I'm sorry we did all our best, but he didn't make it. If there's anything we could do for you, just say it. Again, I'm sorry." 

Deb started to cry harder than before. Karen took her in her arms. 

"I'm sorry Deb." Karen said, tears sliding down her cheeks.

_To be continued..._


	3. chapter 3

**THE TORMENTS OF LIFE ****  
Chapter 3**

Two hours after the announcement of Dan's death, Deb was still crying, she had a lot of stuff to think straight. She and Karen were still at the hospital, in the waiting room.  
"Deb?" said Karen.  
Deb raised her head, her eyes were all red and tears were still sliding down her cheeks.

''yeah''

"I'm gonna call Keith, to tell him about Dan… and if you want… I could also tell Nathan."  
"I want to tell him myself…"  
"Okay."  
"Could you drop me off to the school?"  
"Yeah…just let me call Keith."  
"Okay."  
Karen got to her feet, she took her cell phone out of her purse and walked to a quiet place. She entered Keith's cell phone number on her own phone. She only got his voicemail: "Hey, you've reached Keith Scott's voicemail. Leave a message after the beep."

Keith was in front of his class. He was truly enjoying himself, the kids really seemed to listen to him and they had even laughed to one of his jokes.  
At the more unexpected moment he heard his cell phone ring. Life couldn't be more ironic than this, his cell phone was ringing just after he had told them, he wouldn't tolerate the cell phones in class.

"Mr. Scott, I thought you said no cell phone were allowed in here," a student said to him.  
"True, and that's the reason why, I'm gonna shut it off."

Keith took his cell phone out of his pocket, just when he was closing it, he saw that Karen had left him a message. He knew she wouldn't have left him a message and would have call him back in any situation unless it was important. He had a bad feeling it was about Dan, his brother.

"Would you excuse me, please, I really have to check the message."  
"Sir, you said that you wouldn't aloud to someone to take the message in class either and you said that rule included you too."   
"I know, what I said, Josh. I'll come back in 5. You better all behave."

Keith walked out of the classroom. He open his cell phone and listened to Karen's message: "Hey Keith…huh…It's Karen, you should call me back…on my cell phone. It's important…It's …It's about Dan. Please, call me as soon as you can. Bye."  
Keith press on the touch that had Karen's cell phone number in memory. He heard the phone ring three times before someone answered.

"Hello?" he heard Karen say.  
"Hey, Karen it's Keith. You said you had something important to tell me about Dan."  
"yeah…"  
"What is it ? and where are you 'cause I can barely hear you."  
"I'm in my car…and about Dan, I don't really know how I could possibly tell you this."  
"just say it, for god sake!"  
"Dan is…Dan is…dead, Keith. I'm really sorry."  
"Oh my god! That can't be true!"  
"It is… I'm sorry"  
"How Deb's holding ? She must be devastated."  
"She is, anybody in the same situation would be."  
"And Nathan?"  
"He doesn't know it yet. I'm dropping her off to his school, so she can tell him."  
"Ok. Do you want me to tell Lucas."  
"I would appreciate it, if you could."  
"Ok, I've got to get going I'm in the middle of a class. Bye Karen."  
"Bye Keith"

Keith was shocked. He hadn't really reacted to the news so far, but now he wanted to cry. He tried to take a hold of himself so he could end his class. After this he would go tell Lucas.

Deb walked through the doors of the school and head straight to the reception. A woman, who was probably in her mid-forties welcome her.

"Hi. May I help you?"  
"Huh, yeah…I would like to talk to my son"  
"It have to be an important motive, if not, we're not aloud to disturb a student while he's in class."  
"Believe me it is."  
"If you say so. May I have his name."  
"Nathan…Nathan Scott."  
The woman typed on her computer the name.  
"Ok, He's in english. I'll send someone to bring him here."  
"thanks."

"…I know you will probably think the year is starting off too fast with the thing I'm gonna announce you, but we have a lot to do this year and if we want to get through the program with the time we have, we have no other choices but to start right now. I'm gonna put you in team of two and before anyone asks, no you can't make your own team. I don't want anyone to come to me after class and ask me for a change of team mate you're gonna have to deal with the person I will put you with. Now, that this point is clear let me come to the task you will have to do. I'm gonna ask you to chose a Shakespeare's play, it doesn't have to be a well known play, just one of his plays. You will have to write a response to what you will read. In this response you will have to tell me what's the meaning of the text, what it represents for you and how it affects the world. Are there any questions?" 

The teacher looked around the class, no one seems to have something to say.

"Great, now is the time to team you up: Melina Anders with Jared Anderson, Matthew Atkins with Bobby Baker, Brooke Davis with Kyle Ferguson …"

Brooke stop breathing when she heard the name of her teammate. She wished she had misunderstood.

"Tell me something Peyton?"

Peyton raised her head and looked at her friend. 

"What?"  
"Did he really say 'Brooke Davis with Kyle Ferguson' ?"  
"Yeah, that's what he said"  
"Oh god… no!"

Brooke looked towards Kyle who was smiling at her sweetly. He looked like the typical geek with the big glasses.

"Not him… if I ask to Mr. Halliwell in a seductive way to change my partner, do you think he will accept?"  
"You heard him, he said he wouldn't change our partner and I don't think that seducing him would be the best solution, Brooke, he's gay and you know it..  
"Oh god, why luck is never on my side?"  
"Stop being such a drama queen." Said Peyton with a laugh.  
"Don't laugh, Peyt ! You're not with HIM." Said Brooke with a disgust look.  
"Not HIM, Brooke, it's Kyle"  
"Whatever…"

Peyton got back to her drawing while Brooke was still complaining about her team mate.

"… Andrea Ross with Clark Sanders, Peyton Sawyer…"

Peyton raised her head form her drawing at the mere mention of her name. She listened carefully.

"…Peyton Sawyer with Nathan Scott…"  
Nthan raised his head immediately when he heard that his name was following Peyton's name.

"Now that I've made the teams you can go see your partner and decide what you will be working on."

Peyton start to raise from her seat but was pull back down by Brooke's hand.

"I have a plan to escape from this. I'll say to Mr. Halliwell that I don't feel too well and he will send me to the nurse and I will ask him if you can come along with me because I'm not sure I will be able to hold on thus far. This way we won't have to work with our disgusting partner, even if I don't know who's your partner, and it will be a good way to cut the class. What do you think?"  
"I think that Mr. Halliwell won't buy your crap. Remember, we had him last year and by the end of the year he didn't believe in a single thing you were saying."  
"Right…"  
"Look, go see Kyle and you will probably have one of the best grade of your life."  
"Are you saying I'm dumb?"  
"Not at all. Listen, work with him or don't, I don't really care 'cause I have a partner to see and I have to work with him on our project. Bye"  
"Wait…Who's your partner?"

Peyton raised from her seat, looked at her friend and said: "Nathan."

"Nathan as Nathan Scott ?"  
"The one and only."

Peyton started to walk toward Nathan desk.

"Hey" said Nathan to Peyton.  
"Hey, sorry if it took me a long time to come. It's Brooke she's freaking out because she's with Kyle."  
"I see. At least she's sure to have a good grade."   
"Yeah…So do you have any idea for our project?"  
"Not really, I'm sure everyone will take Romeo Juliet."  
"Yeah… so we're going for something else."  
"Well, it depends do you want to work on something everyone knows and will be real easy to work on or something a little less known and will be a little harder."  
"Anything, it doesn't really matter, you?"  
"I'm going for the easy one."  
"So Romeo and Juliet it is."  
"Ok."

While they were discussing a woman knocked on the door and the teacher answered her.

"Can I do something for you?"  
"Yeah, I would like Nathan Scott to come with me to the reception."  
"Ok, Nathan Scott?"

Nathan and Peyton turned their heads toward the door, where the voice was coming from.

"You have to go to the reception."  
"Ok."

Nathan started to pick up his things.

"Do you have any idea, why they're asking you to go there?" Asked Peyton.  
"No, not at all."

Nathan arrived to the reception with the woman and saw his mother sitting on a chair. It was obvious she had been crying.

"Mom, what's going on?"  
"Nathan…" She said raising to her feet and taking her son in her arms.  
"Mom ?"  
"Your dad…he…he passed away"

Nathan was under shock. He didn't know what to do, he couldn't think clear. He hold his mother tighter, a single tear sliding down his left cheek.

Keith was walking through the halls of Charleston High, He was looking for Lucas, but he was nowhere to be seen. At an unexpected moment, he felt someone put his hand on his shoulder. He turned around so fast that he barely hit that person.

"Hey! Easy Keith !"  
"It's only you , Lucas. You kinda scared me"  
"I realised that. You seem nervous, is it your classes ?"  
"No, I'm fine on that side."  
"That means something's wrong."  
"Yeah…and it's something I have to tell you."  
"Ok, then spill."

Keith looked around the halls full of students.

"Not here, let's go to my classroom, it will be more private."  
"Ok."

Keith led Lucas to his classroom. Once they were there, Keith stayed silent. He was trying to think of a way to break the news to Lucas, but none seemed to be appropriate. How could you tell to someone who hated his father and barely knew him that he was dead? Really, there was no appropriate way for this kind of situation.

"Keith, you said you had something to tell me, so spill, 'cause you're making me nervous when you're all silent like this."  
"I do have something to tell you, I just don't know how to phrase it"  
"That must be something real big. Is it about Dan?"  
"Yeah…You remembered after his heart attack he went into coma…"  
"Oh…I got it…don't tell me he's …dead."

Keith just looked at Lucas, saying nothing.

"wow…not "wow" as " wow!", but it's unbelievable, it can't be true…I mean he's supposed to be strong and in health and…"  
"Stop Lucas, you're babbling."  
"God! Tell me it's a joke."  
"Lucas…I'm sorry, but it's true."  
"I need to sit"

Lucas sat on the desk that was closer to them and stayed silent.

"Lucas, you gonna be ok?"  
"I don't know…I don't know if I feel bad or relieved. How should I even feel ? I never thought something like this could happen. He was my dad and I've never had a real relation with him and now he's dead. It's so confusing."  
"I understand."  
"I should ask you how do you feel? I mean, he was your brother it must be hard even if you had your differences."  
"It is hard, but somehow, I am as confused as you are. The last weeks, between me and Dan, before his heart attack, were more complicated than ever."  
"I see."

They stayed in silence for a couple of minutes before Lucas spoke again.

"I think, we should let down everything here and go back to Tree Hill"  
"I think so too, but after everything that has happen in Tree hill, I'm not so sure I want to go back forever."  
"I suggest, we go for the funeral and everything and decide after what we will do afterward."  
"Ok. You're really mature Lucas, you know that? It's a great thing you're there 'cause I would have been reluctant to go back there without you."

_To be continued..._


	4. chapter 4

this chapter has been reviewed, some correction has been made, I changed all the ''leaved'' for ''left'' and some other things.

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 4**

Haley huried herself out of the classroom. She had only spent an hour without Nathan and she already missed him. Haley had her mind on so many things that she didn't look where she was going. That meant she didn't see the curly blond girl, who was also wrapped in her own world, that was coming her way. They collided together.

''woah…''said the girl as she collide with Haley.

''Sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going,'' said Haley without realising the person with whom she was talking.''

''it's ok, I wasn't either… Haley,'' said Peyton after a pause to give a look to the girl she had collided with.

''After hearing her name,'' Haley realised it was Peyton.

''I didn't realise it was you.''

''I've seen that.''

''Where were you going?''

''I was just walking. You?''

''I was looking for Nathan.''

''Don't bother.''

''What does that mean?''

''Well, you see, he's in my English class which was our first period and someone ask him to the office.''

''Why?''

''No idea and Nathan didn't seem to have a clue, but, you know, it might be for basketball.''

''Maybe.''

''What do you say if we go sit and catch up a little?''

''I'm all for it.''

''The two girls started to walk alongside toward a little bench.''

''Tell me, what have you done this summer with Nathan?''

''Not much really. I had to find a job and so did Nathan so we could pay the rent and once in awhile Nathan went to visit his father.''

''How did he react when he learned about Dan.''

''He didn't know how to react to it at first. Then he practically came to think that his life would be better if Dan was dead, but it didn't last long, he really realise that it was his angrier talking and that no matter what happened in the past, his father is his father and he loves him.''

''Nathan really grew up since he's with you. If it had happen while he was with me he would have stuck to his first reaction.''

''Thanks…I guess.''

''It is a compliment. You change him, Haley, in a good way.''

''Thanks''

''What I'm gonna say is in no point link to this. It's about Lucas…do you have news from him?''

''Not from him directly, but since I'm working at the _Café_, Karen told me what he told her.''

''That would be…''

''I was getting there. Apparently, he's fine, He loves _Charleston_. He didn't say if he was missing _tree hill_ or anything of that sort, but he probably does.''

''Thanks'', said Peyton, with a little deception in her voice.

''It wasn't what you were hoping for, huh?''

''No, not really. You know he told me he was leaving with a letter, I would have preferred if he had told me in person.''

''He probably thought you would try to change his mind and he knew you were the only person who could do such a thing.''

''The thing is I wouldn't have, but it would have given me a chance to tell him goodbye back. In this letter he also told me that he was sorry for screwing my friendship with Brooke, and that he would miss me, that he liked every moment we shared together and the way he wrote everything, it was like he was telling me he loved me.''

''But he does love you, Peyton.''

''Maybe, maybe not. You know he also wrote a letter to Brooke and I don't know what he wrote her. As far as we know, it could be the same things.''

''Don't think so.''

''How so?''

''Because his feelings for Brooke never been as strong as the one he had for you.''

''How can you be sure?''

''He told me so, not in so many words, but he did and the way his eyes were glowing each times he was talking about you, give it all.''

''I guess I'll never really hear it from him.''

''At that time Brooke came to them running.''

''Peyton, you've got to help me. It's a matter of life or death.''

''What is it this time, Brooke?'' Asked an exasperated Peyton.

''Kyle…''

''What about him?''

''He wants me to go at his place after class, so we can work on our project.''

''There's nothing bad about it.''

''It is bad, it is so bad, this is Kyle Ferguson we're talking about, if anyone knows I've been at his place, it's a social suicide. I just can't go.''

''No one has to know…''

''The thing is… he's already screaming everywhere that I'm his partner. What do you think he'll do if I only put a feet in his driveway? I just can't do it. You've got to help me, he'll probably come here soon. Just pretend that after class, I'm going at your place and you will help me in math.''

''Stop there Brooke, he was in my Math class last year. He knows I'm not that good in math, at least not enough to help you.''

''Doesn't matter Peyt, just improvise, please. I'll owe you.''

''Ok, ok.''

''Thanks Peyton'' said Brooke while hugging her friend.

Brooke let go of her friend and turned to look at Haley.

''So tutor girl…''

''Brooke, you know her name so use it'', interrupted Peyton.

''Whatever, I just thought that "tutor girl" sounded great, but if you rather me using Haley…''

''Yeah, I'll prefer it, like that''said Haley.

''So, before Peyton interrupted me, I was going to ask you where is Nathan?''

''You don't remember, Brooke? In English class, Nathan was asked to the office''said Peyton.

''No, I don't, but Kyle was boring me to tear, I was falling asleep. At least you had Nathan part of the class before being all alone.''

''You're working with Nathan? ''Asked Haley to Peyton.

''Yeah, the teacher made the team by alphabetical order, so Sawyer and Scott it's really close and all…''

''You doesn't have to justified yourself, it's ok…''

''Brooke your worst nightmare is coming our way…''

''Hide me, please.''

''We'll stick to the plan, would you?''

''Where is he? Is he close?''

Peyton didn't answer her, but welcomed Kyle: "Hi Kyle!"

''Hi Peyton. Huh…Brooke, could I talk to you?''

''go ahead…''

''Alone, please…''

''No, just do it here.''

''Huh ok, Do you think you could pass by my place tonight after school, so we can work on our Shakespeare project?''

''No, I can't.''

''But we have to do it, soon.''

Brooke was pleading her friend with her eyes, to do something, to help her out of this mess.

''Huh Kyle ?''

''What Peyton ?'' Asked Kyle, not leaving his eyes from Brooke.

''You see, these times, I feel really down, said Peyton trying to look down, like she wasn't feeling right, which in some way was true. You know, my boyfriend just dumped me and I need my friend, my best friend to be with me.''

''Oh, I understand, I'm sorry Peyton. I heard about Lucas, I'm so sorry. Then Brooke, you don't have to work on this project, I'll do it.''

At the mention of Lucas, the two friends looked at each other. A shadow came across their eyes. They remembered the whole story, the hurt that came from it, the crying and everything else. Brooke quickly recovered from it, and said to Kyle: "Thanks."

''No problem, Brooke. I'll leave''said Kyle a little deceived.

On that note, he left.

''Peyton, I didn't know you had it in you, said Haley. Ever think about being an actress?''

''Yeah, she's right. Where did that come from? I've known you for years and you've never been one to be good at lies'' add Brooke.

''don't know.''

At that moment, Mouth came to them.

''Hey girls!''

''Hey Mouth!'' Said the three at the same time.

''I've just seen Kyle, it seems somebody crushed his heart.''

''Hey, it's not my fault, he's just so… so not my type and it would have ruined my reputation…''

''No need to explain, Brooke. I just wanted to tease you, that's all.''

''I hate it, when you do it.''

Mouth just laughed.

''Just wanna ask you, does anybody have Math in the next period?'' asked Mouth.

''I do'' said Brooke.

''Great, that way I won't be alone.''

''And I won't either. I have to go to my locker, first. Can you come with me, Mouth?''

''What, afraid he's gonna attack you if you doesn't have a strong man with you?''

''Well, you know locker are real bad, they always attack poor girls like me when they think they're safe. So, you coming?''

''Yeah.''

''Bye Peyt, bye Haley''said Brooke already leaving for her locker.

''Bye ladies'' said Mouth when Brooke called for him.

Peyton and Haley just laughed at how those two were acting. It was clear for them that Mouth had feelings for Brooke. They couldn't tell if Brooke shared the same feelings, but they thought that if it wasn't there yet, it would come sooner or later and probably sooner than later.

Peyton was looking around, when something glowing on Haley's finger caught her eye.

''What's that Hale?''

''That? oh, huh, nothing !''

''Yeah I totally see it, a gold nothing, not in form of a ring that is not on your left hand, yeah totally. It's a beautiful nothing. Seriously, show me.''

Haley gave her hand to Peyton.

''Haley? That's…That's a wedding ring.''

''Huh, yeah.''

''When did that happen?''

''A little before Lucas left.''

''Wow! I just can't believe it! So now, I understand why you had to find a job, you're now living with Nathan and you're sharing the rent. I should have realised sooner. I can't believe you two are married!''

''huh yeah, it's pretty strange.''

''Wow, I should congratulate you. So, congratulations! ''Said Peyton, giving a hug to her friend.

''Thanks.''

The bell rang.

''I guess, it's time to go to the next class.''

''guess so. Where are you going?''

''Art class, answered Peyton. You?''

''I've got music.''

''Ok, bye''said Peyton as she leaved.

''Bye.''

Haley was walking towards her music class. As she walked, she started to see a familiar face, it was Nathan. She ran towards him.

''Nathan?''

''Haley, I was looking for you.''

''Where were you?''

''That's the reason I wanted to talk to you. Don't look for me for the rest of the day.''

''Why?''

''I won't be here?''

''And again, Why?''

''Because, Haley, my mother needs me. My dad…''

Nathan didn't need to end his sentence, (not that he could, he just wanted to break down here in the arms of his lovely wife. He didn't care if the other students saw him) Haley had realised what he meant, Dan was dead.

''Oh my god, Nathan, I'm so sorry'' said Haley, hugging her husband.

''Haley, you should go to your class. I just wanted to tell you, I wouldn't be there, so you wouldn't worry.''

''No, I'm not going. I'll stay with you.''

Nathan pulled away from the comforting arms of his wife.

''Haley, go in class, you'll be no use. You know, it's gonna be boring, we have a lot of stuff to do and you need to go in class. After school, go home, I'm gonna be there for dinner.''

''You need support, I'm gonna be your support.''

''I appreciate it, Haley, I really do, but do me this favour: Go to class.''

''Nathan…''

''Please Haley…you're gonna be late, so go.''

''I don't care if I'm late, all that matters is you.''

''Haley, just do it.''

She was going to object again, but when she saw his look, he was prying her to stay here, she decided to go his way and do what he asked.

''Ok.''

''Thanks Haley, said Nathan as he kissed her, I love you.''

''Love you too.''

Nathan left Haley to go join his mother.

Haley couldn't understand why Nathan didn't want her to be with him during this though moment of his life.

* * *

Lucas and Keith were already on the road, after they had packed their luggage. It was really awkward for them to get back to _Tree Hill_.

Keith didn't know how it would go, he didn't know if he could face Karen after everything that had happened, her saying no to his proposal, him sleeping with Deb (Karen didn't know about the latter but he was sure it was only a matter of time), he also didn't know if he could face the wife of his brother. Everything was so mess up!

On Lucas side, it was the same thing. He didn't know if he could face Peyton and Brooke ever again. Part of him was thrilled about going back to _Tree Hill_, he would see his mother again, Haley his best friend, his brother and …Peyton even if he didn't know how it would go. As much as Lucas was thrilled to get back home, he didn't like the reason why he was going back there, it wasn't because he misses _Tree Hill_, but because Dan was dead. The death of Dan…his father, was the most confusing thing he ever had to face. He still didn't know how to react to it, part of him was sad about it because he never had the chance to actually know him. Another part of him was angry for the same reason.

The ride was pretty quiet until Keith saw a billboard saying: "Welcome to _One Tree Hill !"_

''Home, sweet home!''

Lucas turned his head towards his uncle and just looked at him.

''Where to, first?''

''The _Café, _mom must be there.''

Seeing Keith fearful look, Lucas added: "but I would understand if you don't want to go. Just drop me there."

''No, it's ok, I have to face it someday and it's not like your mother and I are enemies.''

''No…but it's awkward between you two.''

''It's fine, Lucas. Your mom will be surprise to see you.''

''I think, she's kinda expecting it, but she'll still be surprise.''

Keith stopped the car in front of the coffee shop. Memories of him and Karen came to his mind, but he pushed them away.

''We're here! Are you sure you wanna come in, you can still …''

''I said it was fine, Lucas.''

''Ok then.''

They both open their car door and stepped out.


	5. chapter 5

This chapter is really short, I know, but at lest there's one.

I wanna thank everyone who left me a review, I really appreciate it, that's what keeps me going and if you see somethign that's bugging you in my writing, tell me, I'll try to correct it. Thanks again for the reviews.

One last thing, in case you don't remember, I finally decided to make it Leyton.

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 5**

Nathan couldn't believe he was in this place. He never would have thought he would be here this soon, in fact he never thought about the death of one of his parent. Now that he has to face it, he didn't realise if it was true or if it was just a nightmare.

''Nathan, honey?''

Nathan shook himself out of his thoughts.

''Yeah?''

''Which one, do you think your dad would have liked?''

''I don't know. And fairly I don't think it's important at this point, 'cause where he is, he don't care at all.''

''Nathan...You don't understand. I know that where he is he doesn't care which coffin we will pick, but I feel like we have to chose what's best for him, what he would have love, because I have this feeling he's watching over us and...I want him to be proud...I know it makes no senses...and it's totally crazy...but...but that's how I feel about it, said Deb with difficulty because of her sobs.''

''I understand the feeling, no matter what we choose we'll never know for sure if it's something he would like. I suggest we just pick one and leave this place the sooner we can.''

''I can't resign myself to choose, it's like proving your dad his really dead.''

At this moment, a man came in the room.

''Did you decide what you want?''

Nathan looked at his mother and saw that she really couldn't bring herself to choose, she just wasn't ready to say goodbye to Dan, neither was he, but he had to take things in hands.

''We'll take this one, in the corner.''

''Great choice.''

_Yeah right, thought Nathan to himself, the only thing you now need to say is that he's gonna be comfortable in this coffin. Like he cares!_

oo

Lucas pushed the doors of the Café, what he saw broke his heart. His mother was sitting at a table, and pictures of her and Dan, when they were in high school, were spread all over the surface. She wasn't crying, but it seems like she was going to crack at anytime.

''Mom?''

Karen jump out of her sit.

''Oh my god, Lucas!''

She run towards her son and threw her arms around him to hold him tight.

''I've missed you so much, Lucas, said Karen.''

''Me too.''

She let go of him and look at him head to toe.

''It's me or you took a couple of inches during the summer.''

''Not that much, an inch or two.''

''You didn't change so much, it's great.''

''I hope so.''

Karen looked behind her son and saw for the first time Keith in the doorframe.

''Keith !''

''Karen... nice to see you.''

''...you too.''

Keith looked around the Café and said:

''It's pretty quiet around here.''

''I thought I'll close the Café, for the day, with the big news, and...''

''Yeah, I understand.''

The atmosphere was tense and Lucas was feeling out of place. He realised that Keith and his mother really needed some space, so he left them alone and went to his room. Nothing has really changed, all of his things he didn't brought with him were still there. Lucas looked at his watch and saw that school would be soon over, he decided to go to _tree hill high _and see if Haley would be there.

oo

Haley didn't even try to put her mind on what the teacher was saying, all she wanted was going home and wait for Nathan. The bell rung and she jumped out of her sit. She walked out of the class and ran towards the exit.

''Haley, wait!''

Haley turned around and saw that it was Peyton that was calling for her. She waited for her to join her and then started to walk again.

''What's the hurry, Hale?''

''Dan...Dan's dead.''

''OH my god! How's Nathan?''

''That's the thing, I don't know, he just told me and left and he didn't want me to go with him. And now I have to go to our home. He told me he would be there for diner and... I wanna be there for him, but when he told me to go to my class it was like he didn't want me to be there for him and it's stressing me out''

''Don't worry Hale, Nathan still need you, but he probably wanted some time alone and he certainly had a zillion things to do with his mother.''

''I know, it's just...I don't know, I can't explain why I'm that worried.''

Mouth was walking out of the school when he saw what he thought was a ghost. He couldn't believe his eyes were seeing correctly. Was it really...Lucas? He walked over to the guy and realised he didn't have hallucinations.

''Lucas, man, what are you doing here?''

''That's now how we say hello to a friend around here?'' Said an indignant Lucas

''It's great to see you, but you were supposed to be in Charleston or something like that and now you're here. Are you staying for good?''

''I don't know, depends on how things will go, but I might be here for a while.''

''What bring you here, if I can ask?''

Lucas didn't have time to answer him because someone jumped into his arms and threw her arms around his neck.

''Lucas, you're here! I'm so sorry.''


	6. chapter 6

_Thanks to everyone who left me a review. Sorry for the delay. I'll try to update faster next time. _

_one last thing, I probably told you but Leyton stuff will take time to happens. just be patient, althought there's alitlle bit of interaction between the two in the chapter._

_enjoy the chapter!_

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 6**

Peyton was trying to reassure Haley about Nathan. She was sure he was fine. Suddenly, she heard Haley say: "Oh my god!" and then she saw her run toward some guy she couldn't quite see.

''Haley, what the hell!''

Then she saw who it was. Lucas ! She couldn't believe he was there. She was stressing out. How would she deal with him, now that he was here. She had dreamt so much about this moment since he was gone, but now that it was there she didn't know how to handle it, handle him.

''Haley, you're sorry for what? Said Lucas, slowly pulling away.''

''Dan...''

''It's okay Hale.''

''What about Dan, asked Mouth who didn't understand. Don't tell me he...''

''Yeah...he passed away, answered Lucas a little distant.''

''I'm sorry, said his friend.''

''Don't be, it's not like, he and I were close. He never try to know me and I think it's fine like this. That would probably hurt too much if he would have. And it's certainly more difficult for Nathan right now than it could ever be for me.''

''I'd like to know how he's feeling about this, but he didn't tell me anything, said Haley.''

''He will, after all, you two are married.''

Peyton couldn't stand to watch him talk with Haley, not that she was jealous of her or anything, but he hadn't seen her so far even if he had she wouldn't have known how to react. She wanted to leave right away but that wouldn't have been fair for her friend. Haley would wonder where she was.

''Haley, I'm gonna go.''

It's only then that Lucas realised Peyton was there. She seemed nervous, probably because, like him, she didn't know what to say. He would have love some time alone with her, to be able to talk to her and see how she had been lately, but he knew it wasn't the time.

''You really have to go? Asked Haley.''

''I'm supposed to meet Brooke and do something, so yeah, I have to leave.''

''You sure Peyton? because Brooke left not so long ago, just after our French class, said Mouth.''

''We were suppose to meet at my house, half-lied Peyton, because she was suppose to meet Brooke after class just not at her house.''

''You and Brooke are friend again, that's great, comment Lucas, feeling he had to say something just to prove her, he didn't ignore her.''

''Yeah and no thanks to you, she snapped back.''

She couldn't believe she had snapped at him. He hadn't done anything wrong, since he was back. _you missed him, you idiot, you're claiming you love him and your snapping at him. That's great Peyton! It's not this way you're gonna get to talk to him and see what he really feels for you. On second thought you shouldn't think about it, you and Brooke promised each other not to let any guy get between you two again especially, Lucas. It's really not the time to screw your friendship with her, you did it once your not gonna do it again._

''Bye Hale, Mouth...Lucas, she added him in a bitter tone and again she couldn't understand why. Sure, she wasn't going to profess her love to him in the next minute, but she could have been a little bit nicer, that wouldn't have hurt.''

Lucas watched her leave. The way she answered him proved him she hadn't forgive him yet, and she probably never would. He had to be realistic; he had hurt her really bad. He tried to recover fast and suggest to Haley to bring her back to her apartment. She accepted his offer. They salute Mouth and left.

oo

Peyton was walking through the parking lot of the school, troubled by her behaviour with Lucas, when someone called after her.

''Peyton, wait! Where are you going?''

She turned around and saw Brooke on the side of her car.

''I thought you had left, at least that's what Mouth told me, said Peyton to her friend while closing the distance between them.''

''No, I was here all alone, waiting for you and wondering what you were doing that was taking so long.''

''I was with Haley...she's worried about Nathan.''

''Nathan is a big boy, I think he can take care of himself, said Brooke while getting into her car.''

''She knows he can, the thing is...Dan's dead, said Peyton while she was also getting into the car.''

''Oh my god! Is this the reason why you seem all trouble?''

''Not exactly...I don't know how to say this...but...but Lucas is back.''

''Oh...my...god ! ...Did you talk to him?''

''More like snap at him.''

''How are we going to deal with this?''

''Stick to the plan. We DO not let him get between us. We can talk to him, befriend him but we don't allow ourselves to go further. Deal?''

''Deal, said Brooke a little unsure but still extending her hand to her friend so they could seal the deal.''

Peyton extended her hand too and they shook it.

''Anyway, he told me that he rather be friend with me in his letter and that he was sorry for all the trouble it causes, so I guess we won't have too much problem with the friend part, that is, if he wrote you the same thing in yours. Did he? Said Brooke in a hurry.''

''What?... Oh, yeah!''

''So I think we know where we're standing in all of this.''

''Totally.''

''Yeah totally.''

Even if they agreed to this, both girls weren't sure if it was what they really thought.

oo

Haley and Lucas were at Haley and Nathan's place. They were talking about their summer for what seems like hours. They were now talking about his return.

''You do know that your return is going to shook everyone's life? Asked Haley.''

''I know, and there's two lives in particular.''

''You mean Peyton and Brooke?''

''Exactly.''

''How do you think it'll go with both of them?''

''Well you've seen how Peyton reacted when I comment on their friendship; it's only an indicator on how it will go with Brooke and her for the days to come.''

''I don't know why she reacted like this?''

''Why are you saying this ? I'm not surprised one bit, I've kinda expected it with what I did to her and Brooke, but I was still hoping it would turned out better.''

''I'm surprised because her reaction is the total opposite of what she told me.''

''And she told you...''

''I can't tell you.''

''I have this rule, when you start saying something, you have to end it.''

''Well in this case, it doesn't apply.''

''Why not?''

''Because it's confidential and I'm the only one to know this and I know she wouldn't want me to tell you, at least not yet.''

''Ok, I respect that.''

''At the same moment the apartment door opened.''

''Haley, you're there? Asked Nathan with a tired voice, he didn't bother to look in the kitchen.''

Haley got up hastily and practically ran towards her husband.

''Nathan ! she said as she put her arms around him. Are you alright?''

''I'm fine, but my day was hell on earth. Now all I want is some alone time with my lovely wife, said Nathan before kissing Haley sensuously.''

The two lovebirds literally stopped their exchanged when they heard someone coughing. Nathan raised his head and saw Lucas on a stool in his kitchen. It knocked the breath out of him, he was completely shocked.

''Lucas, since when you're in town?''

''Today, answered Lucas simply.''

''Are you here for good?

''I don't know, only time will tell.''

''You're here because of Dan? Asked Nathan, almost sounding like a reproach.''

''Partly, I also thought you could use the support and honestly I was missing my friend and my little brother, he said referring to Haley and Nathan.''

''Well, it's great to see you!''

oo

Brooke got in her room. She was so confused since Peyton had told her Lucas was back. The moment she put a foot in her room she looked through her wardrobe to find a little box where she had put every little things that were directly link to him. She found it on the ground of her wardrobe. She picked it up and went to sit on the foot of her bed. She opened the box to find a book he had lent her, some pictures of both of them when she thought he loved her and was happy with her, and she also found THE letter, the one in which he told her he was leaving and was sorry about everything. She unfolded the letter and looked it for a couple of minutes, before starting to read it again.

_Brooke,_

_I don't really know how to start this. I'm going to start with: I'm sorry. Sorry, for everything I've done to you. I know how bad I hurt you. I know that all the sorry in the world could never ease your pain, but I'll say it again, or write it, I'm so sorry. If I had to do it again I wouldn't because I could not bear the thought of hurting you. Believe me or not, you're important to me, I care a lot for you. I hope someday you will be able to forgive me and that day, I hope we will be able to become friends. _

_Brooke, I'm sure you won't have a problem to find someone who will be more suitable for you than I am, because you're a nice girl, you're funny, you're smart, you have a beautiful smile, you're sweet and you feel great in your own skin. I'm sure someone will see it someday and will love you for the person you are. _

_Before signing off, I just have to tell you that I'm leaving to Charleston with Keith. I have to put some order in my head. I don't know for how long I'll be gone, but I know it'll help us all._

_Take care of yourself, _

_Lucas_

She put the letter aside, and took the pictures. She looked at each pictures. They seemed so happy together. Why had he preferred Peyton to her? She loved him so much. He was the first guy she ever loved this way and he broke her heart like she never thought someone could. Her eyes were watering at the memories of him.

Some knocks on her door followed by someone saying her name, interrupted her thoughts. She looked up at the door and saw Mouth.

''What are you doing here?''

''I wanted to see if you were alright?''

''Why wouldn't I be, she said gaining her composure back.''

''I guess Peyton, didn't tell you.''

''Oh, you mean that Lucas is back. I don't give a damn, she said putting all the Lucas' thing back in the box.''

''You sure?''

''Yeah, she said not looking at him.''

''Brooke you don't have to put on an act in front of me. If you're really affected by him coming back, you don't have to hide it from me. I'm your friend and I'm here for you.''

''I know, she said finally looking up in his eyes''. She couldn't keep it for herself anymore and she just start crying, slowly.

Mouth rushed to her side and wrapped his arms around her.

''I just don't understand... why did he chose her over me...and then... just decide he doesn't want either of us...and then he expect us to be friend...just because he wants to. I loved him...for the first...time I was in love with the guy I was going out with...and he cheated on me...with my best friend. Now he's back...and I don't think I can deal with him...yet.''

''I know it's gonna be hard for you, Brooke, but I'll be there for you. You can count on me.''

She looked up at him and faintly smiled. She knew he was there for her. He hugged her.

''Thanks Mouth. I'm kind of tired, do you mind if I ask you to leave?''

''I do not. I'll see you tomorrow. Have a good night and don't forget I'm here for you.''

''I won't.''

He kissed her on the forehead and left the room. Brooke gave a last look to Lucas' things and put them back in the box.


	7. chapter 7

Thanks guys for the reviews I really appreciate them.

Someone was wondering if i would make it Mouth/Brooke and tht's xactly what i wanted to do.

note: The Leyton stuff we'll kind of take time to come and so does the Mouth& Brooke stuff.

Hope you will like the chapter.

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 7**

Today was the day of Dan's funeral. Lucas was in his room and was trying to sort out everything that has been going on since he came back, three days ago. First of all, the death of Dan, he still wasn't sure on how to react to this. He was sad about this, not because his dad was dead, but because it was affecting the life of the people he loved, his mom, Keith, Nathan. He was sad for them. He wanted to be there to support them. Keith seemed to hold on and so was his mother, but it was another story for Nathan. He was acting like he didn't care, like nothing had happened and if someone was talking about it he would say he was fine and would make it clear he didn't want to hear about this and this was worrying Lucas. He was scare his brother would keep all of this for himself and would get bitter and that someday it would all get out and would hurt every body around him including Haley. Lucas felt he had to do something about it, but he didn't know what and he had also some problems of his own. There was Peyton and Brooke. Since he was back he hadn't talk that much to Peyton, each time he was trying to talk to her she would answer him in a bitter tone that she didn't want anything from him, not even his attention. Brooke, on the other hand, had been nicer to him, she told him she was ready to be his friend as long as he didn't push too much. She didn't want him to insist, to talk about what had happened last year. She had said something that left him curious: she said that her and Peyton had agreed to befriend him as long as it didn't get any further than friendship. The only thing is, if they really had agreed on this, why was Peyton acting so distant? All this was too strange.

_knock, knock_

This simple noise, got him out of his toughts.

''Lucas, you're ready?'' Asked Karen on the other side of the door.

''Not quite.''

''Hurry, we have to go.''

''Yeah.''

He put on his shirt and tried to put on his tie, but was unable to do so.

''Mom ! Can you come?''

Karen opened the door, and laughed at the scene in front of her eyes. Lucas was in front of his mirror and he had tied up his tie completely wrong. She walked up to him and started doing it correctly.

''I never seem to know what's the trick.''

''Well, that must be because you needed to have female help.''

''Mom!''

''what? I couldn't resist. Here it's done, now put the jacket on.''

Lucas did exactly what he was told.

''I'm ready.''

''I guess we can leave.''

''Does Keith come with us or is he going by himself?''

''By himself. Now come.''

''Mom, will you be able to hold on?''

''Yeah, I will.''

''Ok.''

They walked out of his room and made their way downstairs.

oo

Nathan entered the church, holding on Haley's hand. He saw that his mother was already there. She was sitting on a bench and was looking at a wall. He brought Haley with him to his mother. They sat right by her side.

''Mom, you okay?''

She looked up at him and smiled faintly to him.

''I'll be fine.''

She turned back to the point on the wall she was looking at, before he arrived.

''Nathan ?'' she asked

''Yeah.''

''Have you ever thought, that we might be responsible for what has happened to him?''

''What are you talking about? The doctors said it was due to stress. We cannot be held responsible because he had a lot of stress and couldn't dealt with it.''

''What if we were the cause of his stress? Then we would be responsible for his heart attack. Everything happened at the same time. I decided that we couldn't be together anymore because he was too exigent with you. he wasn't the man I loved anymore, so I decided I wanted a divorce. When that happened, you decided you wouldn't chose between us and that you'd rather live on your own, this way you wouldn't owe him anything. We can say whatever we want, but Dan had a heart and it hurted him that we turned our backs to him. He tried to win us back, but we just kept pushing him away. The more he was trying, the more we pushed him away and the more he was stressing out. We are responsible for this.''

''No! No, we're not! Did you ever think he deserves what we did to him! I guess, not! It was a payback for everything he did to us! Mom, he treated you like you were nothing or barely nothing. He treated me, like I was some way to live up his dreams for him, the dreams he couldn't reach! He's been a pain in our side all our lives ! So, don't think we are the cause of his death, he did it to himself. I assure you I will **never**, do you hear **never,** think he died because of me. I have **no guilt** over this and I'll **never** feel guilty for this !'' said a furious Nathan.

Nathan wanted to say a hell lot more than this but when Haley said his name and told him to calm down he stopped. He looked at his mother and saw she was crying. So he did the most natural thing, he put his arms around her and whispered to her that he was sorry, but he was thinking every word and that she should think, like him, that she had nothing to do with his father death.


	8. chapter 8

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 8**

The church was full of people. The mass had begun. You could hear people crying and sneezing. At one point, the priest said: "I'll now ask to Nathan, Dan Scott's son, to come up here and give a last homage to his father."

Nathan gave a squeeze to both his mother's hand and Haley's. He stood up and walked to the priest and started to talk.

''First of all I'd like to thank everyone for coming. I could be here and just brag about how good he was and everything, but I won't. I think people deserve to know the truth. Most of you think of Dan Scott as a saint, as the basket ball super star he was back in high school, but you don't realise it was only a surface. You should have been in my mother's life, mine and others. He took my mom for granted; he never really thought she was human being. I'm sure at one point he was in love with her, but it faded away and he treated her bad, not like she deserved to be treated… Mom, I'm sorry for saying this, I know you don't want to hear about this, but you know it's true. As for me, I was only a way for him to live the dreams he never reached. He wanted to live it through me. I had to be the best everywhere, but not only the best, I had to be better than myself. I could have won a game with a lot of points ahead of the other team and all those points marked by me, it would never have been enough, he always wanted more. He couldn't just enjoy the fact that I had won the game like every other dad. So when it wasn't enough for him, I had to train more hours, lift more weight, run faster. He thought of me like I was a machine. You think that's all there is to know about Dan, well you're wrong, there's so much more to it. Before me, he had another son, that he never acknowledged. He never treated him any better. He thought me to hate him, to make his life harder and to not let him take my spot on anything. He's been rough on him, he even blackmailed him to leave the team. He was also a real ass to his mother. A lot of people told me to be proud of my father, but proud of what? Him being a star back in his time or him being a real asshole? Neither of them is a reason to be proud of him. I just hope I'll never be like him and that I will never repeat the sins of my father. One thing before I leave, even with everything he did, I can't stop myself from loving him, he was my father and nothing will ever change that.''

Nathan gave a lingering look to the crowd: his mother was crying, like he thought she would. Lucas was giving him a supportive look. He could read in his uncle eyes a kind of approval, but also sadness. His grand-parents were also crying, by the way they were looking at him it seemed they were agreeing with him, but not completely. His friends were just there for the support. Haley was looking at him with compassion and just love.

He left his spot and walked back to the bench to sit in between his mother and his wife.

_I know it was a really short chapter and I'm sorry about that, but I'm really busy with school and other fics. I,ll try to update sooner next time_


	9. chapter 9

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 8**

After the funerals, some people reunited to Deb's house, it was mostly the family: Dan's parents, Keith, Nathan, Haley, Lucas and Karen.

The adults were all in the living room, while Nathan, Haley and Lucas were in what used to be Nathan's room. No one was speaking as if it would have killed them to do so. Nathan had enough of this silence.

"You know guys, it's not because we've been to funerals today that we have to keep up with the sad mood. Let's talk about something that is not link to any of this."

"Nathan, it wasn't any funerals it was your dad's, "said Haley.

"I know that Haley, but I had a life outside of my dad. The fact is, we all had a life outside of him and, I, for one, want to continue living this life."

Lucas didn't say anything, he had to agree with Nathan, they all had a life waiting for them. The only thing he didn't agree with, it was how Nathan was dealing with all of this. He had decided to put aside the fact his dad was dead, but sooner or later this would get back to him and it wouldn't be pretty.

"I suggest we talk about Lucas and two hot girls," said Nathan.

Lucas shot him a glance, saying: "did you really have to bring that up!"

"What do you want to know?" asked Lucas.

"How is it with them, since you came back?" Said Nathan

"Peyton barely talks to me and Brooke...well, she's been friendly to me."

"Does that mean you want to get back with her? Brooke, I mean," asked Nathan.

"No, I don't."

Haley spoke up: "I think is falling back for Peyton."

"Really?"

"Not falling back. It's more like, I keep falling for her and harder each day."

"Does she know?" Asked Nathan.

"Don't know, if she does she didn't learned it from me, but I think she must have some doubts about my feelings, that is, if she read my letter and…. she probably don't want to deal with it."

"You should tell her face to face" suggested Nathan.

"No, not yet. At least, I can tell her I wanna be her friend."

"Just friends? You're sure?" Asked Nathan.

"I want more, but for now, it'll do the job. I want to take baby steps."

"I see what you mean, but it seems to me you're taking turtle steps not baby's one."

"Whatever."

ooo

Deb was saying goodbye to Dan's parents.

"you know Deb, if you ever need our help, just ask. We'll be please to help you" said Dan's father.

"Thank you, I'll remember that."

"Kiss Nathan, for me, would you? Good bye Deb" add Dan's mother before leaving.

Deb walked back to the living room where Keith and Karen were.

"We should go too, said Karen, you must be tired and you certainly want to get some rest."

"No stay, I don't want to stay alone for the moment. Nathan will probably leave soon and I'd really like you to stay."

"Ok, we will" said Keith.

"I don't want to deal with tomorrow. The lecture of the testimony is really scary."

"It's tomorrow?" asked Keith.

"Yeah, with everything going on, I forgot to tell you that you were invited to the reading, Keith… and Lucas is too."

"He put Lucas in his testimony!" Exclaimed Karen, surprised.

"I guess he did, otherwise he would not be invited" said Deb.

"I'm just surprised. He never acknowledge him as his son" added Karen.

"I guess, he felt ashamed about what he did. We'll see tomorrow what it's all about" said Keith.

"I guess"said both Karen and Deb.

ooo

After the funerals, Brooke and Peyton went to Peyton's place.

"I feel so bad for Nathan and Lucas", said Brooke.

"I do too, but more for Nathan than Lucas. Nathan's been closer to his dad than Lucas ever been, although it wasn't always pure love."

"Yeah... Talking about Lucas what's the deal with you about him?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me Peyton Sawyer. You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"No, I don't."

"Come on, I've seen the way you act with him. When he tries to talk to you, you shut him off. I thought you wanted to be his friend. You're rough on him, for someone who wants to be his friend."

"I want to be his friend, it's just that... I'm not sure I'm ready. My heart is still aching. I have to be honest with you, Brooke... I think I still have feelings for him."

Brooke was speechless for a few seconds.

"You know, I still have feelings for him too, but I'm putting them on the side. Lucas is a great friend and I rather have him as a friend than resenting him because I still have feelings for him."

"Right now, I'm just not ready to deal with it. I have to sort things out."

"I understand."

"Brooke looked at the time and realised it was time for her to get back home."

"I have to go Peyt."

Ok, I'll see you tomorrow.

"Yeah, see you tomorrow, at Karen's cafe, girlie."

Brooke left the room and Peyton went to her desk and started drawing.

ooo

When Nathan and Haley left Deb's house, Lucas left with them, while his uncle and his mom were staying with Deb. He asked Nathan to leave him at the River court. There, he saw his friend Mouth, sitting on a bench. He walked up to him and sat beside him.

"What are you doing?" asked Lucas.

"Just some thinking."

"about?"

"About...Lucas, what do you do when you're falling for someone?"

"You're asking me? Me, the guy who doesn't have the guts to tell the girl he once loves that he still has feelings for her."

"Who are you talking about? Is it Brooke?"

"No, it's not her."

"Peyton, then?"

"Yeah… but don't tell anyone. I don't want to create another mess, right now."

"I won't."

"If you asked me this question, that means you like someone. Who is it?"

"Promise me, you won't be mad."

"Why would I be mad?"

"It doesn't matter, just promise."

"I won't be mad. So... who is it?"

"It's Brooke, Brooke Davis."

"wow... "said Lucas at loss of words.

"You're not mad, are you?"

"No, I'm not. My feelings for Brooke are simply platonic, plus, I told you my heart is still with Peyton."

"Ok, great!"

"So, you wanna tell her?"

"I don't know if I should… I might lose her friendship."

"Sometimes you have to take the risk."

"Why don't you follow your own advice?"

"I don't even have Peyton's friendship and I want to win her friendship before doing something. You, on the other hand, should tell Brooke. She likes you a lot, I can tell and she might have fallen in love with you too, who knows?"

"You think?"

"Do you want me to test the water?"

"If it's not too much to ask."

"It's not. I'll get back to you on this, but right now I have to go see Peyton and try to win her friendship."

"Well, good luck."

"Thanks. I won't forget to talk to Brooke, said Lucas, before getting up and leaving."

ooo

Lucas had walk all the way to Peyton's house. He was now in front of her house. He got to the front door and knocked on it. No one answered, but he was certain she was home. He try to turn the knob and succeed, he then pushed the door. He walked to her room, where loud music was coming from, like he thought it would. Her door was open; she was at her desk and was drawing. She was so beautiful when she was concentrate on something. He couldn't keep himself from staring at her. He missed her so much during those weeks in Charleston it was unbelievable. He raised his hand and knocked on her door frame.

Peyton's head jerked up. She stopped drawing when she saw it was Lucas. She put all her things away; she didn't want him to see her draw: it was of her and him in the dark. She had written in a corner: "Like someone is afraid of the dark, I'm afraid you'll break my heart, again."

"What are you doing here!" Asked Peyton with a cold voice.

Lucas felt hurt by her tone, but he could understand why she was so cold to him.

"I needed to talk to you."

"About..."

"You and I..."

"Go figure!" She interrupted him.

"It's not what you think."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah...I just want you to let me be your friend. I care about you and I'd like you in my life the same way Brooke is."

"Why would I do that?"

"Peyton, let your guard down for a moment. I'm not planning on hurting you. All I want is to have something with you, something like a friendship."

"What if I'm not ready for that. What if I simply don't want to?"

"Than I'll wait for you. I'll wait as long as I have to."

"I wanna know something, first: Do you plan on staying or will you leave when Keith will get back to Charleston?"

"I don't know, it all depends on how things will turn out."

Peyton just looked at him, not sure if she was satisfied with is answer. Did it meant "if things go well between you and me, I'll stay, if not, I'll leave" or did he meant it in a general way. Should she take the risk anyway?

"I guess, I told you what I wanted to tell you, so I'll leave."

Lucas turned around and started to walk towards her bedroom door. Peyton was tempted to let him go without saying anything, but…

"Lucas, wait!" Pleaded Peyton.

Lucas turned around to face her.

"Yeah?"

"It's ok… I want your… friendship."

"That's great Peyton!"

"Don't get to excited, it won't be easy. I still need to put some order in my head about you and I, but I want to try this."

"I know this won't be easy, but I want to take the risk."

"I want you to take things slow, don't rush anything. Let things happen by themselves, ok?"

"Ok."

"I guess you can go now."

"I guess."

Lucas left her room and she got back to her drawing.

_It might take a while before I can post the next chapter. Be patient, it'll come for sure._

_Thanks to everyone who reviwed so far I really appreciate that, i hope you liked the chapter._


	10. chapter 10

_so sorry for the big delay. I feel so bad for not updating for a month, I would love to say I'll make it up to you by updating sooner for the next one, but I'm not sure it'll be possible, but I'll try my best. Anyway thank you to everyone who reviewed, it's always appreciate!_

_now the chapter, and please leave me a review!_

* * *

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 10**

Lucas sat alone in the living room, reading. He heard the knob turned and is mother calling for him.

"Lucas, you're home?"

"in the living room."

He put his book aside, knowing his mother wanted to talk.

"Long day, huh? He said when his mother got in the room."

"Yeah. Deb is pretty distraught. I feel so bad for her."

"It must be hard for her at the moment."

"Yeah, to top it all, she's really worried about Nathan."

"She has reasons to. I'm worried about him to. The way he's been dealing with Dan's death, its not right. For him it's like nothing happened. He rather forgiving it ever happened and just move on."

"That's not healthy."

"No, it's not. Sooner or later it'll get bet back to him."

"It will, like tomorrow for example."

"What's tomorrow?"

"That's the thing I wanted to tell you when I came in."

"What is it?"

"You've been invited to the testimony lecture."

"You've got to be kidding me! Why would I be invited?"

"I've wondered about that to. Anyway, Keith will pick you up at one o'clock, at the cafe."

"ok."

"Lucas, we have something else to talk about. A topic we've been avoiding since you're back."

"What "topic"?" asked Lucas fully knowing what she was referring to: him staying or not. It's like everyone wanted to know.

"You, staying for good or not."

_exactly, what I thought! he thought to himself._

"Oh...that one."

"Yeah, that one."

"I don't know what I will do. All I know is that I'm staying for a while. Further than that, it all depends on how things will turn out, but I'm tempted to stay for good. In the two months, I've spent in Charleston, I've really missed Tree Hill and my friends and...my mom."

"I've missed you to, Lucas." Karen put her arms around her son and holded him tight. She was glad he was back even if it wasn't for a long while. She had really missed him during those two months and just talking to him on the phone wasn't enough.

The next morning, Brooke was driving down to Karen's Cafe, where she was supposed to meet Peyton. She parked her car in front of the coffee shop. She pushed the door of the Cafe and got in.

When Haley heard the bell of the door ting, she looked up from what she was doing and saw Brooke coming in.

"Can I help you, Brooke?"

"Yeah, I'm supposed to meet Peyton here. She's not there yet, I suppose?"

"no, she's not."

"Ok then, I'll take a coffee."

"It'll come right away."

Brooke walked to a table close to the window and sat there. Meanwhile, Haley was preparing her coffee, when Lucas came in.

"Hey Hales! How you doing?"

"Hey Luke! I'm fine, you?"

"Could be better."

"Why?" because of the lecture?"

"Kinda, yeah"

"I see."

"How's Nathan?"

"Great actually, which is scary."

"Yeah. Where is he right now?" ask Lucas, somewhat worried about his little brother.

"At work."

"Will he go to the reading?"

"Yeah. Keith will pick him up and then they're supposed to come for you. It's weird that you have to go to this thing!"

"Tell me about it!"

"Wait a sec, would you? I have to serve this to Brooke."

"Brooke is here?"

"Yup, you didn't saw her car when you come in?"

"I guess not, I was pretty hung up in my thoughts."

"you're always caught in you toughts!" comment Haley with a small smile.

"Yeah…just give me the cup, I'll bring it to her. I have to talk to her, anyway."

"Ok."

She gave him the cup and he started to make his way to Brooke's table.

"Miss is served" he said, while giving her the cup.

"Lucas..." said Brooke, surprised he was there, but really she shouldn't have been, she remind herself, because after all, his mother was owning the Café.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, just to start the conversation.

"Waiting for Peyton."

"Peyton is coming?"

"Yeah…you know, don't take it the wrong way if she's acting pissed with you, she's just not ready..."

"it's ok, Brooke, we settled the problem."

"Really? When?"

"Well yesterday night, I went to talk to her to put things straight in between us and we agreed on being friend,"

"She didn't tell me this, this morning on the phone."

"She probably would have, maybe she wanted to tell you in person."

"you might be right. So...You can sit a little before Peyton arrives."

"ok"

"so what are you planning to do, today?" asked Brooke to fill the conversation.

"nothing much, I have to go to the testimony reading."

"Oh... don't you feel weird about it?"

"Yeah, because let's be honest, Dan never acknowledge me and he includes me in his testimony, it just doesn't make sense. Anyway, I'll see what it's all about this afternoon. So what are you going to do with Peyton?"

"Girl stuff, talk about boys, shopping, you know, the usual girl stuff."

"I see. So...I've heard that you and Mouth spent a lot of time together this summer."

"where did you heard that?"

"I just did."

"You're not jealous, are you? Because that would be weird seeing you…"

"What? No...I just thought it was a great thing if you were friends. Mouth is a nice guy."

"I know that. He's a really good friend. He's honest, funny, he doesn't think of me as a slut like most of guys. I like to talk to him and hang out with him."

"That's great. He likes you a lot, you know?"

"Yeah, like a friend like his friend." Stated Brooke.

"...well, yeah."

"He's there something you wanna tell me? I feels like you know something I don't about Mouth."

Lucas saw Peyton making her way to the Cafe.

"Peyton's there" says Lucas just when she opened the door, he didn't want Brooke to learn Mouth liked her in a more than friend way, by him.

When she got in, Peyton saw Brooke and Lucas together. She felt something in the pit of her stomach, something she used to felt when the two were together. This something was jealousy. _Peyton get a hold of yourself, they're friends the same way you and him are. So...Don't be jealous, she thought to herself._ Peyton smiled to them and walked over to the table.

"Hey guys!"

"Hey Peyton" they both said.

She sat the same side as Brooke and they said nothing for a couple of seconds, until Lucas got up.

"I'll let you girls do your girl stuff. Me, I'm gonna go see Haley. Have a nice day."

Peyton got up right after Lucas left and sat in front of Brooke.

"What were you guys talking about?" Asked Peyton really curious.

"Something weird." Said Brook, giving a slight glance towards the counter where Lucas was with Haley.

"How weird?"

"I don't know. We talk about Mouth and how he's now my friend and I felt like Lucas knew something I didn't. At first I thought it was a kind of jealousy, but then he told me it wasn't that. I don't understand."

"Brooke, you're blind!"

"I'm not blind, I see pretty clearly, ok?"

"Nope. What Lucas knows is what everyone can see, of course he wasn't witness of that, but Mouth probably told him."

"Told him what?"

"You're really are blind. Mouth - likes - you." Said Peyton putting emphasis on each word.

"I know."

"Are you sure you really understand what it's all about? Brooke. He really likes you. He has a crush on you."

"Oh..."said Brooke as it slowly sank in. "But...no you're wrong Peyton. He like me as a friend, that's all."

"Whatever Brooke. We should get going."

"Yeah, and why don't we bring Tu- huh Haley with us?" Said Brooke.

"That's a great idea! Are you warming up to her now?"

"I figured, I had to give her the benefice of the doubt."

"Great!"

Meanwhile Lucas and Haley were talking.

"so what did you have to say to Brooke?"

"I had something to check for Mouth."

"What something?"

"Guy stuff."

"Seriously Lucas, what is it?"

"No, I promise Mouth, I wouldn't say anything."

"If it's what I think, everybody already knows except Brooke."

"Really?"

"You haven't seen them together since you're back, but it's obvious he likes her."

"Oh...well anyway..."

Lucas got cut off by Brooke.

"So Haley, Peyton and me were talking...and we thought you should come with us. We're going shopping and just hang out. Do girl stuff. Wanna come?"

"Well...I have to work." Said Haley, not really knowing why all of a sudden Brooke would like to hang out with her.

"Haley, go. I'll do your job, my mom won't mind" said Lucas.

"But you're mom is not there."

"She only have a class...she'll be back in what? An hour?"

"yeah, but what if her class was running late and you'll have to left the cafe with no one when you'll be going to the reading." Said Haley trying to find an excuse. She thought this invitation was too weird coming from Brooke, she was kind of scare of how it would turn if she did go.

"God, Haley, go! I swear my mom won't say anything and her classes never ran late and even if it did she would come back in time. Ok?"

"Ok." Answered Haley reluctantly.

Haley took her things and left the cafe with the girls.


	11. chapter 11

**The torments of life **

**Chapter 11**

¤¤¤¤

Once outside of Karen's cafe, the girls got in Brooke's car.

So Haley...the way you seemed to find an excuse not to come, does that mean you didn't want to spend time with us? Asked Brooke faking hurt.

Well...no. It's just, I have responsibilities towards Karen and I don't want to deceive her, tried to explain Haley.

Don't stress out Haley, she's just messing up with you, said Peyton.

Yeah, I'm just messing with you. I think you have to lighten up, take things less seriously, add Brooke.

Haley answered nothing to this. The girls stayed silent for a while until Peyton speak up.

Haley? Before we asked you to tag alone, me and Brooke were kinda arguing about something.

Peyton, don't go there, please, pleaded Brooke.

Haley, continued Peyton ignoring Brooke plea, you've seen how Mouth acts around Brooke, right?

Yeah, like everyone else.

Peyton, please stop it! Pleaded Brooke once again.

you do agree that he likes Brooke a lot and that he does act like someone who has a crush on her.

Yeah, it's pretty obvious. The guy is crazy about you Brooke.

See, said Peyton and then she stick out her tongue to Brooke.

Ok, maybe he does, admitted Brooke, but what difference does it makes. I won't stop being friends with him for that.

We're not asking you to do that, Brooke, said Peyton.

Yeah, I would say that the real question is, how do you feel about him, Brooke? Asked Haley

Brooke didn't say anything on the subject, but just said, while parking her car: "we're at the mall girls!"

¤¤¤¤

Karen got to the Café right after her classes. When she walked in she saw her son standing alone behind the counter.

"Where's Haley, Luke"

"She went shopping with Broke and Peyton. I told her you would be ok with that. You are, right?" asked Lucas wondering if he hadn't made a mistake.

"It's fine. Thanks for taking of the café while Haley and I weren't there."

"No problem. It's not like I had anything else better to do. So…how was your class?" he asked curious.

"Great! I never thought I would love it so much!" she answered really enthusiast.

"It's kind of weird to see that my mother goes to school"

"Does that bother you?" asked Karen worried her son didn't want her to study.

"No, not at all. The important thing is that you enjoy it, not what I think of it."

"I really Love it!"

"Then I'm totally cool with it. Even if I weren't, it's your choice, not mine I have no say in this."

Karen smiled at her son and went behind the counter to kiss him on the cheek. She put an apron on and started to clean the counter.

"Is Keith stil picking me up at one?" ask Lucas changing the subject.

"He's supposed to…"

"Sorry for bringing that subject up, but are things alright between the two of you?"

"Things are…"

_¤FLASHBACK¤_

Karen saw Lucas leaving the room. She knew what he was trying to do; he wanted them, Keith and her, to talk. Seeing Keith standing there was making her nervous. She didn't know what to do or how to react. Her palms were starting to sweat and she only wanted one thing, to run away. She needed to break this uncomfortable silence that had settle between them since Lucas had left the room.

"It's great to see you" said Karen trying the best she could not to show how uncomfortable she was in this situation.

"It's great to see you to, althought I would have wished for it to happen in other circumstances."

"Yeah…youknow, Keith…I'm really sorry for last year." She said, immediately regretting saying this. She didn't want to bring that subject up right now, but she had.

"You are? Why's that? It's not because you don't love me the same way I do, that you gotta be sorry. It's not your fault, our hearts love who they love and you can't control it."

"…but Keith, I broke yours."

"I won't lie to you, Karen. It did break my heart when you told me you didn't share the same feelings, but I could never hate you for this. You'll always be the most important person in my life, that you love me or not." said Keith trying to reassure her.

"I'd like to change things, to get back to last year."

"Why?"

"Because, Keith, I wish I had reacted another way."

"Which way?" asked Keith, suddenly really curious. He wanted to understand what she meant.

Karen looked down for a few seconds. She was trying to find a way to say the things she wanted to say. No words seemed to fit her thoughts. She thought that, maybe, she shouldn't tell him.

"I guess it doesn't matter anymore." She said defeated.

"Karen…it does matter." he pleaded her.

"No, not anymore 'cause what is in the past is in the past. I shouldn't have bring this up."

"Karen…"

"…so, Keith do you have somewhere to stay for the night?" she asked, changing the subject to make sure he would understand she didn't want to talk about it anymore.

"Yeah…on my way here, I reserved a room at the motel."

"Perfect. Do you want to drive with Lucas and me to the funerals?"

"No thanks, I'll go by myself."

"Ok." answered Karen, simply. She was feeling the atmosphere getting more tense each seconds, he was probably feeling it to because he told her: "I should go. I'll see you soon."

"Bye." said Karen watching Keith leave. She was starting to regret not talking about what she meant. She wanted him to know that in reality she loved him to and that if she had told him she didn't it was because she was scare of losing their friendship if it didn't work, she was scared of breaking her routine and lose herself.

_¤END OF FLASHBACK¤_

"Things are... fine but complicated. We'll work it out."

"I'm sure you will."

At that moment, the door of the Café opened. They turned around to see Nathan coming in.

"Lucas, Keith is waiting in the car for us. Are you ready?"

"Sure" said Lucas to his brother. He turned to his mother and kissed her on the cheek "See you later, mom"

Karen watched her son leave with Nathan, his brother. She sat on the stool that was right by her side. She was somehow hurt to see that Keith hadn't came in, but had stayed in the car she was wondering how things could go back to normal, back when Keith and her weren't afraid of being around each other. She was missing this time they used to spend together: the dinners, the mockeries, all of those things that made her feel great. She had to do something, but what? She couldn't possibly tell him, she loved him, could she? Certainly not after everything that had happen. Maybe they still needed time to figured some stuff out or maybe things would never be ok between them anymore.

**¤¤¤¤¤**

**(Mall: Brooke, Haley &Peyton)**

The girls walked in the mall, with Brooke in the lead. As she was walking, she turned around to talk to them.

"So...I think I need a new dress. You know, I really have to start to work my magic on boys once again. So I need a really stunning dress...oh and shoes that goes with it, said Brooke to the girls. She was really hoping it would kept them form the _"Mouth subject"_. She wasn't ready for all those questions on him and how she felt about the guy, because she didn't have those answers. She had never thought about the possibility of him and her as a couple...wait, who was she kidding? She had wondered about it a couple of times, but nothing had really come out of it. It never had been enough to answer those questions and so many more she had in mind.

"_Boys_ or Mouth?" asked Peyton with a knowing smile on her face. She knew her friend enough to say that she was slowly falling for the guy, but she was denial.

"Boys in a general way, Peyton! After Lucas, I kind of swore off boys, but it's time for me to put an end to this."

"Really! Mouth is included in "the boys" category, I suppose?" asked Peyton not really expecting and answer from Brooke, but a reaction.

"Oh, shut up, Peyton!" said Brooke lightly hitting her friend with her purse.

Haley just watched the two interact, laughing at them. She was really in admiring Brooke and Peyton friendship and she was wishing she would have that with a girl. Of course, she had Lucas. He was her bestfriend and she loved him to death, but it wasn't the same. No matter how long they knew each other and were friends they were still some subjects she wasn't comfortable talking about with him, seeing he was a boy.

" I call a truce, Brooke!" said Peyton as she and Brooke were still faking a fight.

"Fine! But we change the subject and don't talk about it for the rest of the day!"

"Fine by me!" answered Peyton.

"What about you, Haley?" asked Brooke.

"I agree."

"Perfect, plus I've got a oh so more interesting subject to talk about!"

"What is it, Brooke?" asked Peyton, knowing she had something on her mind.

"Well, as you both know, I talk to Lucas…" started Brooke.

"Yeah and…" said Peyton, wondering where her friend was going with all of this.

"Well, he told me some interesting facts…"

"Well…" said Peyton, now fully knowing where Brooke was going.

"How come you didn't tell me, you and him had straightened things out, yesterday night? Were you going to tell me, at all?" asked Brooke. She might have seemed like she was mad, but really she wasn't, she was only deceived she hadn't heard it from Peyton first.

"What?" exclaimed Haley, a little over reacting. She was just surprised Lucas hadn't mentioned anything back at the café.

"I take it, by your reaction, Haley, that Lucas didn't mention anything either." Said Brooke.

"Not a word."

"Well Peyton, care to explain?" asked Brooke curious of what had actually happened.

That was it; Peyton knew it was the subject Brooke wanted to talk about. _Damn you, Lucas and your big mouth"_ Really, it wasn't that much of a deal that he had talk about it; it's just that she wanted to tell Brooke herself. He probably didn't know she hadn't said a thing, so he wasn't really to blame, was he? Now that it was done, she had to deal with it.

"I was supposed to talk to you about it, Brooke and I suppose Lucas would have told you to, Haley. I guess it didn't go that way, as it? I'm sorry for that!"

"So how did it happen?" asked Haley, wanting to know more.

"Huh, well…He came over to my house last night, told me he wanted to be friends and it was up to me to make the decision, That's pretty much it."

"I guess this is great" said Brooke "I just thought there would have been more to it."

"Like what? Me jumping on him and having this big make out session with him saying: _'Oh Lucas I want you, let's be friend again'_."

"No, that's not what I meant. I just thought it had happen in a more complicated way, I guess."

"I thought that to" add Haley.

"Now, why's that?"

"Peyton, you and him never had the simplest history. It is only natural for us to assume it went a little more complicated than what you said" said Haley, explaining her thoughts.

"Well it didn't. Could Lucas, be another subject not to talk about for today, please?" asked Peyton because Lucas was one thing she wasn't comfortable talking about. She and him might have decided to be friends, but there was still some issues that needed to be cleared out between the two of them and there was also some she needed to clear with herself.

"Fine we let this one out to" said Brooke "But really, what is there left to talk about?"

"Plenty, Brooke, plenty. I'm sure one f us will come up with something." said Haley to the brunette

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_Hope you like this chapter. Please leave a review, it's always appreciate and its the thing that keeps me going._

_Thanks to everyone who reviewed so far._

_I'll try to update in a few days, but I can't promised. Be sure I'll do the best that I can to update soon._


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